New Year, New You? I’ve had a few conversations lately that tied into not only goal setting, but also the procrastination of those non-urgent-yet-still-important parts of daily life. So let’s explore finding your own internal sense of urgency, and tap into some family movie lessons along the way.
Hold the phone. “Urgency?” You want me to get stressed?
First, not all stress is bad stress. And secondly, no. That’s not what I’m saying. What I’m saying is that it takes intentionality to make things happen, in work and in our lives. Sometimes, we need to intentionally STOP doing something so that we can succeed. Other times, we need to stop starting a million and twelve things, and start finishing the work we already have in progress. And still other times, we need to reimagine what we’re doing with our goal in mind, and start doing something completely different.
For me, I wanted motivation to actually do the things that were most important to me, and get them done. This way, I’d stop having that bad, disappointed-in-myself feeling at the end of the day when I realized I hadn’t done anything meaningful in my previous waking hours. This is why I did it. Now let’s explore how.
Cultivating that sense of urgency
When you’ve got an external deadline, like getting a project done or hosting a workshop, urgency comes naturally. In fact, sometimes it’s in boundless supply, and can lead to undue stress and anxiety. But when the impetus for your wanting to do something is more personally motivated, like starting your business or writing your first novel, it can be harder to cultivate. There’s no external force setting milestones or driving an end date. We can get into a state of qué será será and let these goals linger. When we notice that’s happening, what can we do to “snap out of it”? Arbitrary deadlines probably aren’t great motivation for most people—I know they’re not for me, and they definitely don’t encourage sustainable achievement. So what’s a budding author or entrepreneur or mom of 4 to do?
This seems so simple as I type it out, but it’s really the hardest part. To cultivate that internal sense of urgency, to help you get going and do something, the first step is to start doing it. Wow. Not exciting. I know. The worst part with “just get started” is that very well might seem insurmountable.1 What I’ve noticed for me is that I tend to view my work (both employment and things around the house) in large “chunks.” Sometimes I envision them to be so large that even thinking about having to think about doing them is daunting. It’s just so much, and seems like such a big lift.
When I consciously observe that I’m biggering, as they’d say in The Lorax, then I can take a pause and make a mindset shift. I ask myself, “What is the simplest thing that I could possibly do next?” This forces me to break the work down into more manageable, consumable chunks. It also allows for options. Then, I write down these ideas, these options, and I can choose which one makes the most sense for me to tackle right now. And even better, I can learn something from doing that one little thing!
It’s like that old adage about eating an elephant one bite at a time… but let’s rather think about eating dessert, shall we? We deserve a little treat after noticing what was happening, writing things down, and then holding space for ourselves to discover what emerged. 🍰
What is the simplest thing that I could possibly do next?
Stop biggering. Give your self manageable options. Write things down. Make a choice.
My struggle is real
Let me share a very real example – this blog (not the post you’re reading, but the whole thing). I wrote my first post almost a month before it was published. Why didn’t I publish sooner? Well, there were reasons… First I needed a computer because I wrote it on my phone, and I wanted to make sure it “worked right” before I hit that big blue Publish button. Secondly, I needed to update a link, which was not hard once I started looking for the source. And third, well, let’s be honest: I procrastinated on those first two, and so I forgot that my draft existed until after the holidays… but you know what, once I figured out those three steps (computer check, link update, and publish), it wasn’t as daunting a task. And I did it! I hit the buttons, and beep boop beep, it got here! So even though the struggle is real, the little wins are real, too.
Sustaining your sense of urgency
So far, I’m finding that I can cultivate my sense of urgency just by doing something and getting it done, even if it’s a little thing. That little win feels good. It releases the chemicals to my brain that make me want to keep feeling that way. And to sustain this sense of urgency, without finding myself in constant overwhelm again, or urgency overload, I am leading with intentionality. To me, this means knowing what it is I want to do and why. If I can “explain it to myself” (even if I don’t have to explain it to anyone else), then that’s the reminder I need to maintain my sense of self, and with it, my sense of urgency.
This urgency and intentionality takes work. It’s not just a wish, or a hope, or a New Year’s resolution; it’s a clinic. And it’s for yourself. Like General Mattias shares with Anna in Frozen 2, you have to do the next right thing.
What’s your next right thing?
What could you do today that would be progress on a larger goal? Or maybe it’s that excruciating last step in finishing a project, or cleaning up a room, or hitting send on that carefully crafted email (or publish on that blog post, ahem)? Brainstorm & write down your list of something, anything, that’s a step in the right direction. Whether you’re getting started, or you’re getting finished, I’m sure you’ve got some options to explore. (And you know, we’ll talk more about stop starting and start finishing some other time.)
Could your next right thing be… procrastination?
I’m not saying never procrastinate. We’re humans, and procrastination is a thing we do, a stress response, like having chocolate or going for a run. So like your favorite sweet or your greatest workout, let’s savor that procrastination—just for a moment—be intentional about it, and then, friends, just do the thing. You’ll be happy when that right-next-step task is out of your head and into the world. And who knows, it might be easier or better or clearer than you thought, once you start doing it. And even better, we can all learn something from it!
You’ve got this. Cheers!
Looking for individual coaching?
If you’d like to explore more how to apply practices that are rooted in agility, like noticing, writing stuff down, and learning out loud into your own work/life, reach out. I’m currently open for individual coaching clients.
Note on Mental Health
1For folks who deal with mental illness like anxiety and depression, “just doing it” literally is insurmountable some days. I am not a certified mental health professional, so my sharing here is just what has worked for me. There are free resources for people looking to learn more about their own mental health or aid a loved one at https://www.cdc.gov/mentalhealth/tools-resources/individuals/
Snark & Fire 